I was taking some photos of Lily today and my little man wanted in on the fun. I had wanted to do a lot of this prior to Christmas, but as I said, my advent and Christmas just didn’t go as planned timewise. So here are a few photos of my side-kick and partner in crime….okay, maybe Lily is more my partner in crime as she has an opposable thumb, but I spend more time with this little guy day in and day out that just about anyone. He deserved his own photo shoot today!

I had a zoom meeting with my local oncologist from Bergan Mercy this morning. My CT results came in 15 minutes before the zoom meeting occurred. Stability….with a tiny bit of shrinkage! I will take it! Did you hear me praying, “Thank you, Jesus!” over and over? I really had a bad feeling about these scans, so I was so utterly relieved. I still have a meeting with my sarcoma specialist via zoom on January 13th, but I am pretty sure it will be the same thing….continue on with what I am doing. Now I feel comfortable to make a few plans in 2022. I don’t know what they will be yet, but I feel a weight lifted off my shoulders for the next 3 months.

Thank you to all of you who have been covering me in a mantel of prayer. I feel it and it is working. Thank you!

I don’t know what the weather is like where you are, but I was thrilled to get the opportunity to stay home today! It has been hovering between 1-5 degrees F here with windchills 20 degrees lower than that. We were supposed to have a snow event here but thanks to the Omadome (it’s what the people in Omaha call the bubble over our city when weather goes right around us), it was just an inch or two of blowing snow. I spent the day doing laundry, writing out my goes in my 2022 planner and catching up on my blogging!

I have to admit that I am going to wait to see what the doctor tells me on Monday before I start really focusing on 2022 goals. However, I have decided to continue on at the YMCA, taking 5-6 classes a week as long as I am able. I am toying seriously with the idea of doing a P52 challenge…where you make a concerted effort to take at least one awesome photo a week. That would give me 52 great photos to put into a book at the end of the year.

I finished the Bible in a Year program I was doing with Father Mike Schmitz. I am proud of myself for making this a priority in my life this past year. It meant taking 30 minutes of my time each day and bringing my Bible along with me when I travelled. It blessed me in so many ways. I was literally ugly crying listening to the last podcast…even Father Mike was deeply moved. I belong to several FB groups of people who were participating in the program throughout the year and it was a common comment yesterday….the tears at the end. So….I am doing it again! I already have myself trained to do it and repetition can only help! I gave my parents a tabbed Great Adventure Bible along with the daily readings and some Bible pens and highlighters so they could do it this year as well. I would recommend this to anyone….I just enjoyed it so much.

Well, I don’t know what 2022 will bring for me. I hope that I will have continued stability in my disease and good health otherwise. If that is not what I get, I hope to have the ability to fight my battle with grace and dignity. I sure hope that 2022 brings us all some relief from the COVID pandemic and lets us return to normal…even if it may be a “new” normal. I miss hugging my friends. So many friends and family have had a tough 2021. I pray that they will find some peace and joy in 2022. There are a lot of people who come up and tell me that they have been praying for me daily. I can’t thank you all enough for keeping me covered in prayer. It humbles me to know so many people care. Many times it is hard to remember that when you are stuck alone at home all the time….or at least for the better part of the last 2+ years.

As this first day of this new year comes to a close, I hear my valiant husband out snowblowing our driveway so we can attend Mass in the Nebraskan deep freeze tomorrow. Tallinn is sitting at my feet looking at me with those expressive brown eyes (it’s past his dinner time), my Joe and his wife are spending an evening with their best friends down where they live in Lee’s Summitt, Tim is with his best friend in Phoenix relaxing and enjoying the day, Lily is in her room doing origami stars (she has over 4000 of them in a huge glass jar in her room), and the crockpot is cooking the roast beef, cooked carrots, and baby potatoes that is making the house smell delicious. What more could I ask for? I am so blessed. Let’s walk into 2022 together with happy, thankful hearts that are full of faith and love for our God, who will guide us to where we need to be this year. We just need to open our eyes, ears, and hearts to hear what He is telling us. Happy New Year, everyone. Love you!

I told you that we flew back on the evening of Wednesday, December 29th. Thursday morning, I spent the whole morning doing all sort of stuff at the hospital. I had blood work done first thing in the morning….got my lupron shot (remember that big, long needle? Yeah, that one…right in the derriere.), got my port hooked up to my zometa infusion (my once every three month bone med infusion), then scooted over to the radiology department for a CT of my chest, abdomen, and pelvis with and without contrast. I wasn’t feeling too great with all the extra junk that had been put into my body that day. I managed to go to an evening zumba class to try and get my blood moving and actually still wasn’t feeling too good. However, I think I just needed to flood my system with water…so downed a liter of water that night and then the next morning before my next zumba mega end of year class and was feeling much better. I have to admit that I am always a bit nervous when I am waiting for my CT scan results. I have never felt my cancer affecting my life…it has been the side effects of all the meds I am on fighting the cancer that actually rear their ugly heads and make my life miserable. I always have that thought in the back of my head that it could be spreading and I wouldn’t even know it. I was stage IV and didn’t even know it. I have a zoom meeting with my local oncologist Monday late morning where he will tell me the results of my scans. I haven’t ever had this happen before….I have always gotten to read the results myself first online, so I am a little nervous. I have to keep reminding myself that there is nothing I can do and worrying doesn’t help. However, there is also the little voice in the back of my head telling me this might be the scan that puts me on a new chemotherapy and ends my freedom for doing a lot of the things I enjoy. Anyhow, in 48 hours I will know and be dealing with whatever the results are. I will also have a zoom meeting with my sarcoma specialist at the Mayo Clinic early on the 13th. He calls the shots and he has been great to work with thus far. So here’s my latest treatment photo…the last one of 2021. Still a miracle I am here and as healthy as I am. I thank God for each and every day and opportunity to live my life to the fullest!

I grew up off and on in the DC area. I have been to many of the sites in DC….and now with Rich’s brother living in the DC are for the past several years, we have been able to bring the kids there to see the area as well. Rich and I were actually married in the area over 30 years ago.

We had unnaturally warm weather while we were visiting and so spent some time outside each day. One of the afternoons we spent some time walking around the Washington Monument and some of the monuments adjacent to it. The skies were a perfect cloudy mess for photographers. It allowed the reflections of the skies to really bounce off the reflection pool and the other bodies of water. We found some awesome holly trees and with the warm weather, the cherry blossoms were confused and some were blooming in late December!

Here are a few photos from one of our walks in Leesylvania State Park, near where my brother and sister-in-law live in Woodbridge, VA.

If you think this sounds like a crazy comedy movie….well, it could be! Lily, Rich, and I flew to Washington, D.C. on Christmas day. I felt bad for the people having to work at the airport and I mentioned that to the gentleman at SW that was checking us in. He told me not to be sorry – he was making quadruple overtime! So I just said, “Merry Christmas!” and went on my way to the gate! We were visiting Rich’s brother’s family: Joe & Heather Messina and their kids. Rich’s parents were already there from Destin, Florida, and so was Rich’s sister, Tammie, from Palm Harbor, FL along with her two adult sons. Our son, Tim, was able to join us from West Virginia, just in time for dinner on December 26th, which was the big Christmas dinner. Joe managed to pull off the Italian tradition of serving 7 fishes as well as lasagna and ham. We had 18 family members at dinner that night and it was delicious! (Good thing, because we were eating leftovers for the remainder of our time there – so, so good!) We did a gift exchange and taught those who had never played before how to play “the game” (Settlers of Catan). I love that Heather just learned the game and won twice! Those Messina boys weren’t too happy about that! It was nice to be able to spend time with Rich’s parents, siblings, and our nieces and nephews and their dogs.

We were able to get together with some friends from my very distant past. I am not exaggerating! CPT and Mrs. Weien lived on Ft. Belvoir, VA and they were my family’s next-door neighbors when I was 3 and 4 years old. They have always told their kids that I am the reason they exist, that I was a nice little girl that charmed them when I was little. They had been disenfranchised by some other children they had met and weren’t sure they were going to have kids. Well, they did end up have two fabulous kids and when the Army brought my family and theirs back to the DC area again when I was in high school, Mrs. Weien taught English at my high school and I would occasionally babysit their kids. Kind of like a full circle type of thing. I hadn’t seen the Weiens in a really long time. They brought their daughter, Gwen, with them as well. I got to bring Rich, Lily, and Tim. We had a lovely lunch and the years melted away. I am totally blessed have been surrounded by such wonderful people from the very beginning of my life!

We flew back on December 29th, and Tim flew to Arizona to spend a week with his best friend for his graduation from grad school gift from us. Tim is starting to apply to jobs across the country and has been called back for some interviews…so I am excited to watch him move on to the next chapter of his life. Right now he is having a blast with his friends in Arizona – well deserved after all of the long hours he has put into his internship and grad school.

I have been out of town over the holidays so I am just going through the photographs on my camera. I have to say that I was on a race all the way up until we left on Christmas Day. That is NOT the way I like to spend my advent season. However, on Christmas Eve, the weather was abnormally warm here in Nebraska. No jacket needed! The skies were crazy cool. I was able to take some pictures of a friend and her kids as a special treat…for all of us. Then I went by our church and noticed that I would like to take some photos of the church itself and the nativity. I also was sad I was leaving my sidekick, Tallinn, on Christmas to a dogsitter, so I took a few photos of him by the tree.

This past Sunday, Rich was a real trooper and took me to a couple of places that were on my Nebraska bucket list to photograph. The first stop was the Omaha National Cemetery. It is the military cemetery in the area and has been decorated with wreaths for the Christmas season. The second stop (after stopping at the mall to sign a permission slip for Lily to FINALLY get her ears pierced) we went to the Boby Kerrey Pedestrian Bridge. For those of you NOT from the Omaha area, this is a lit pedestrian bridge between downtown Omaha, Nebraska and Council Bluffs, Iowa….over the Missouri River. There was a full moon and the sunset was pretty spectacular as well. I was able to get some really good city scape photos of the Omaha skyline. This is a bit out of my comfort zone as taking photos as it is getting dark is a challenge. Plus, the wind was blowing like crazy! The photos from on the bridge were hard even on a tripod because the bridge was vibrating in the wind. The suspension cords were shaking so bad it sounded like a freight train. I also want to mention how COLD it was…and with the wind…it wasn’t a lot of fun. Thanks to Rich who stuck it out and only said once or twice….”Are you ready to go? I can’t feel my feet!” The Troll, Omar, lives under the bridge.

Our youngest son, Tim, is a driven kid. I have never seen someone so focused on goals and harder working. I told a friend this morning that if I could have 10 Tim Messinas, we could take over the world. Tim graduated 3 years ago from the University of Nebraska-Lincoln with a degree in Exercise, Nutition, and Health. As of this past Saturday, he graduated from Concordia University-Chicago with a Master’s degree in Strength & Conditioning. I am so very proud of him! Tim currently lives in West Virginia (2 days drive from us) and is a strength & conditioning coach intern at West Virginia University. He can stay in the internship until May…but will be starting to look for a permanent job coaching elite athletes. I am so excited for him. The world is his oyster and I look forward to seeing what 2022 brings for him!

On December 30th, I am getting the works done at CHI Bergan Mercy. I have four appointments that morning…one for blood work, one for a Lupron shot (cue huge needle), one for a Zometa infusion via my port (this is to “seal” my bones from further mets and I get it every 3 months) and then my 3 month scans of my chest, abdomen, and pelvis. I have had good results thus far, but I literally live scan to scan, waiting for the other shoe to drop. I have changed my life quite a bit since the last scan…participating in 6 cardio classes a week. I just don’t know how my cancer is going to react to that. It seems like it would be a good thing…but I don’t know. So I am a little more nervous about these scans.

I am a member of a chronic cancer support group through A Time To Heal. We meet every other week and have only been meeting via zoom for the last couple of years. These people are such an inspiration. They are all stage IV cancer and have been surviving and thriving with their cancer for years. It was exactly what I needed – this group of wonderful men and women. Some of the members have been around since the group was founded in 2010…which is inspiring. We have 3 moderators who are either former oncology nurses or psychologists. They are more like friends and a part of the group though. Those three moderators are retiring this month…so it will be a whole new atmosphere in January as our group will be merged with another group as well. The outgoing moderators went to each of our homes and left a box on our doors. We opened them together during our last zoom meeting together last week. We each got a beautiful mug filled with candy. I loved the message on the mug so much that I wanted to share it with you. Whenever I start to get overly anxious about my upcoming scans and it threatens to overshadow my Christmas season, I glance at this mug and adjust my attitude. I think that you don’t have to have stage IV cancer to get a good message from this mug – so I am sharing it with you all!