Every morning, usually before I even get out of bed, I read the daily Gospel lesson for the day, a reflection on the reading, a prayer, and then read about the saint of the day. If you are interested in this as well, it is through Notre Dame…and it is an email I get every morning in my in box from FaithND. Today is the first of May; it’s a new month. In Nebraska, a lot of folks celebrate May Day by giving baskets of candies. I kinda miss that. Anyhow, today’s Gospel reading was John 14:1-6 :
Jesus said to his disciples: “Do not let your hearts be troubled. You have faith in God; have faith also in me. In my Father’s house there are many dwelling places. If there were not, would I have told you that I am going to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back again and take you to myself, so that where I am you also may be. Where I am going you know the way.” Thomas said to him, “Master, we do not know where you are going; how can we know the way?” Jesus said to him, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”
I am very familiar with this reading. It was read at my Grandma Neitzke’s funeral. It hit me in such a way that I made sure that I had it written down so it could be read at my funeral, that I planned 6 years ago when my cancer diagnosis was pretty new and I wasn’t confident I would survive throughout the year. Instead, I did, and then lost my Joe to a car accident a couple of years later. Michelle, his wife, asked me to read a Bible reading at his Celebration of Life. I sent the above reading to her and she agreed that since it was somewhat of a “tradition”, it would be appropriate. My heart flew into my throat in a quick wave of grief as I started reading that first line of this Gospel reading. It took me back to standing in front of hundreds of people honoring my son…with my reading being a very important part to our farewell to our Joe in my Catholic mom’s heart. Then I read that first line again….”Let not your hearts be troubled.” The weight of my cancer situation relaxed and eased up its vise grip on my body. I read through the rest of the material for today and got to the Saint of the Day, and lo and behold, it was St. Joseph the Worker. It made me smile. The Holy Spirit is allowing Joe to send me a message of support and love when I am feeling troubled. As I was reflecting on this and having a “moment” complete with a few tears along with a smile of love, my phone started to ring. I answered and it was the oncology radiology department I had my appointments at on Tuesday and Wednesday. The nurse told me that they are ready to start radiation treatments and could I be there at 0830 Monday morning? As in 3 days from now! I just remember saying, “Of course! That was fast!”. She said that normally doesn’t happen, but instead of waiting about 2 weeks, I only had to wait 2 days. So Monday morning I start. That means I will finish up on May 22nd…giving me almost 4 full weeks to recover before we leave for Africa. What a wonderful surprise!
I started texting my kids and immediate family the latest news and my phone rang again. This time it was another member of the oncology radiology team, my social worker. She wanted to talk to me about how I was feeling about my upcoming radiation treatment. She asked me if I felt like a burden or a disappointment to others and if I was afraid. We had a very real conversation that was really good. We actually talked for over 45 minutes. We found out we are about the same age…have lived in some of the same states…and have a lot in common. I hope to meet her in person at some point. She actually lives out near me.
So that was how I started my day…a nod from my Joe….an unexpected call moving up my treatment by a full week, a new acquaintance, and the idea that I might be feeling okay for this Africa trip after all. The weather was great and we spent a lot of today outside doing yardwork, sitting on the porch, walking the neighborhood, and catching up with neighbors. We got a package delivered late in the day and it was our travel packages for our Africa trip. God was telling me He was going to make sure I was going. We had no idea they were on their way. It was a blessed day. I have a fight ahead of me and the next few weeks may not be great but today was great.
Messina Musings 